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Posted on 03/10/201612/10/2018 by kisupure

littleskeletonbigheart:

actorsallusionpresents:

neluakgyorun:

actorsallusionpresents:

sexdrugsandllamas:

a-useful-paperclip:

primal-littleprincess:

This is so fucking cute

THIS IS HOW ITS SUPPOSED TO GO. OKAY. NOT HOW FIFTY SHADES DOES IT. ITS. THISSSSSS. CARE & CONSENT. CARE. CARE. CARE. OKAY. CARE FOR YOUR PARTNER AFTERWARD. THATS HOW IT WORKS. OKAY? OKAY.

THIS IS SO FUCKING IMPORTANT DON’T YOU DARE SCROLL PAST IT. IF YOU SKIPPED IT BECAUSE IT WAS A BIT NSFW, YOU SCROLL BACK UP RIGHT NOW

Oh my god this is so cute

WHAT THE FUCK, I’M FUCKING DAMN CONFUSED, IS HE THE FUCKING CAPTOR, THE FUCKING HERO, OR ARE THEY ACTUALLY FUCKING INTO THAT SORT OF FUCKING DAMN SHITE*CRIES*!?

Okay to explain.  This depicts the aftermath of a BDSM session, which seems to have involved at least some bondage as well as sensory deprivation in the form of the blindfold, among other things.  Right away he is “dropping character” from Dom mode to ensure that there is nothing wrong with her and that nothing he’s done during the session has caused any lasting harm.  

The cuddling and blanketing and everything he says is what’s called “Aftercare”.  It’s the most important thing about any good BDSM relationship.  It’s essentially decompression after the occasionally intense experiences, and is where the dom makes the sub feel comfortable and loved and generally pampers the holy hell out of them.   

The thing to always remember about BDSM is that when done properly it should follow three little words.  Safe.  Sane.  And Consensual.  It is the Sub’s job to let the Dom know (either by safewords or other signals) when they are becoming uncomfortable.  It is the Dom’s job to know both their and their Sub’s limits, to listen to both their body and their Sub’s to make sure no one is being hurt, and to listen and pay attention to their Sub’s signals to know whether or not to stop.

Despite there being a Dominant and a Submissive involved in BDSM, it’s actually still a very equal partnership, and one built on trust at that.  The Dom cannot do anything that the Sub does not explicitly want, and the Sub is perfectly able to stop anything that is happening if they feel uncomfortable.  

ALSO ORIGINAL POSTER OF THIS LOVELY COMIC.  I AM SORRY FOR THIS RANT.  KEEP DOING AMAZING WORK.  <3

Holy fuck so adorable. Yes yes

RACK, Risk Aware Consensual Kink, is better than SSC (google RACK vs SSC for the deets), and some people don’t do aftercare and that’s OK! (F’ex, I didn’t like doing it with a dom I saw on the side for a little bit, so it was mostly for his sake, but with hubbu I want and need it.)

But if you’re not that experienced and don’t know for a fact that you don’t like aftercare, and that your dom or top doesn’t need aftercare (because it’s important for them too, yannow, “top drop” and all), then ERR ON THE SIDE OF AFTERCARE!

This is how the vast majority of BDSM scenes end. 50SoG ain’t shit.

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