So my partner and I have been sort of gravitating towards this for a while now, but we had a few conversations several months ago that really sealed the deal for us. I haven’t found much of any other info on what we want to do, aside from the tangentially-related uniform kinks and human pet play (which bears a lot more resemblance to BDSM slavery in its trappings) so here’s like… a pitch, I guess you could say, LOL.
High-Concept: A dynamic where the relationship functions with the trappings of a military/paramilitary/naval personnel unit, complete with appropriate ranks, honorifics, rewards, punishments, and duties. It is a relationship where the subordinate belongs, in body and mind, to their commanding officer, where they trust their commanding officer with their life, and obey their orders with integrity and respect.
WHO’S WHO
The CO: The commanding officer (dominant) ultimately wants the unit (relationship) to function as seamlessly as possible. They want their orders to be obeyed, they want deferment, they want to know that they have their subordinate’s complete trust and obedience. But they also know that the relationship isn’t necessarily about them and what they want – the dynamic between commanding officer and subordinate ultimately exists to accomplish things. The CO, in addition to being fulfilled by loyal obedience, is also goal-oriented, and getting shit done with the help of their sub instills a sense of pride and satisfaction like no other.
The sub: The subordinate (submissive) in this type of dynamic likes following orders, likes being given duties to perform, and likes making their CO proud. Praise for a job well done is the highlight of their day and reinforces their valuable role in the unit. While disagreements can and do happen, and while it isn’t required to perform every duty with a smile on their face, it is unthinkable to them to disobey orders no matter how unsavory or useless they might sound. They are willing to acknowledge that their CO might have knowledge that they don’t, or that the CO is simply human, but it is still of the highest importance to maintain command structure even in the face of bad calls.
RELATED THEMES
Exercise: This dynamic might tend to attract more fitness-minded individuals for obvious reasons.
Physical labor: Related to the above. COs might make their subs carry things for them, perform menial work (like mowing the lawn) or other “gruntwork”, no matter their sub’s gender. (Compare with the tendency in other D/s or O/o dynamics where the polished, pampered appearance of the sub/pet is heavily emphasized.)
Tasks: Not unlike puppy play, this dynamic tends to place an emphasis on duty, accomplishment, and praise.
Protocol: Military-style protocol might involve specific kinds of “readiness”, form/positions, and terms of address while in the company of others.
Self-defense: Participants may or may not have an interest in pursuing training in martial arts or the handling of knives, firearms, or other weapons that can be used for self-defense. Sparring, airsoft, etc. may also be incorporated into the dynamic.
Service: Individuals with a service streak might be interested in a CO/s dynamic. Subordinates will be right at home filling the role of assistant, helping their CO keep track of the day’s docket, running errands for them, fetching them coffee, etc.
SCENE IDEAS
Boot camp: The CO plays the role of drill sergeant, making their subs run laps, do push-ups, holding an uncomfortable position, etc., all the while engaging in humiliation/degradation play. The endurance half can also be sexual.
Readiness drill: Catch the sub completely by surprise (while they’re asleep, while they’re at home (if the CO has a key), etc.) and put them through their paces suddenly, swiftly, and without mercy. Read up on real military/marines “hell weeks” for more ideas. (Get explicit consent for this first, obviously.)
Interrogation: What it says on the tin. Maybe the CO doubts their sub’s loyalty and wants to make sure they’re not an enemy infiltrator, or maybe the CO is secretly a sick son of a gun and has been looking for an excuse to tie them to a chair to funsies since they enlisted. This is a great scene for endurance play and edge play.
Abuse of power: A CO uses their rank to manipulate their subordinate into a sexual encounter. Can be rough, can be sensual, can be more impersonal, the sub can be willing or unwilling – this scene would be a fun way to employ some mindfucks either way.
Sparring: A CO and sub go toe to toe to test their mettle. And no matter who wins, it ends with the sub getting fucked so they know who’s boss. (What’d you expect?)
Firefight (airsoft/paintball): A great way to get the blood pumping, let off some steam, and a good excuse to point guns at somebody.
Medical exam: A CO has to make sure those under their command are in good shape and fit for… combat.
Hazing: Also what it says on the tin. Forcing the sub to do something embarrassing or ridiculous, forcing them into compromising sex in exchange for favoritism, and so on.
SWAT raid: A sort of combination between a readiness drill and interrogation.
Black OP: A kind of military/paramilitary-style abduction scene. (Coordinating open-air abduction scenes are tricky and require a lot of logistical planning. I recommend reading about how to do this from someone much more experienced to avoid getting in serious trouble or traumatizing an innocent bystander.)
PUNISHMENT IDEAS
- Exercise
- Endurance tasks
- Cleaning, especially to a completely unnecessary degree: scrubbing floors with toothbrushes, detailing the SO’s car, etc.
- Starching and ironing the SO’s clothes or shining their shoes
- Inventory: going through kitchen cabinets, storage closets, etc., and writing a detailed log of everything that’s there
- Maintenance: drudge work cleaning/fixing something
- Verbal abuse; ie degradation
- Physical abuse: slapping, punching, kicking, bondage
- Confined to quarters: locked in a room or appropriately-sized cage
- KP duty
- Forfeited rations: you can buy emergency rations online that are pretty gross to eat (the infamous MRE), or figure out some kind of DIY bar that provides all the nutrition with none of the palatability of real food, like hardtack
PARAPHERNALIA
- Pips/bars/chevrons to denote rank
- Tactical gear
- Dogtags
- Collars or harnesses in camo, navy, or black
- Misc military surplus
- Gas masks, full face masks
- Weapons: night sticks, tactical knives, tasers, prop firearms (or real firearms if you know what the hell you’re doing and are prepared to risk your life for kink)
- Power tools (for edge play; again, know the risks)
- Restraining gear: paracord, rope in neutral colors, zip ties, duct tape, hoods for sensory deprivation, bungee cords, nylon webbing, canvas dropcloth, military-style straps from packs, belts, and other gear
- Uniforms (obviously)
MOODBOARD
